Is a white wedding or Church wedding scriptural?
Did the Bible give Pastors/Bishops the authority to pronounce or join a marriage?
Is there a special blessing in getting married or wed in the Church?
Who in the Bible is authorized to join marriage?
Beloved brothers and sisters, the answers to these questions are very important and need to be resolved in light of the Scriptures. Doctrinal issues must be rightly interpreted and explained. Eph:5:31 and Gen 2:24 says a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and they two shall become one flesh. The scriptures did not say in Church or mention pastors.In the year 1164, the church established marriage as a sacrament. Once this happened, the involvement of clergy mushroomed.The Catholic Church did not require marriages to be officiated by a priest until 1563, and the Anglican Church did not get around to making this requirement until 1753. So for the past five hundred years there have been, in the European tradition, three kinds of marriage: legal, religious, and social. But social marriage, strictly speaking, is the most biblical.
There is nowhere in the Scriptures from Genesis to Revelation, or from the words of the prophets, Apostles or even Jesus, who is the revealed God, that said that Church marriage is scriptural. Marriage is purely a family/Social affair. Marriage is between two families. It has nothing to do with the Church. But why have we made something that’s purely unscriptural so mainstream that it has caused so much pain for many couples?
No pastor or bishop is authorized in the Bible to join any marriage. That responsibility is given to the two fathers or the elders of the two intending families and also the government of the land via registry. Why have we made a cultural/family centered function into a religious doctrine that has no biblical grounds. Did the bible ever say that if we don’t get wedded in Church that God blessings is not with us? So many young ladies are single today because their Pastor, Bishop or Prophet told them that the man they are dating is not their spouse. Did the Bible ever give pastors such right?
In America/Europe, people get married in Court or Church. This is purely a cultural tradition. In fact, on these two continents and Asia, the bride’s family takes the responsibility of the wedding. In Nigeria, people take 3 years just planning for a white wedding even after a traditional marriage or court wedding. Some churches in Nigeria forbid couples to know each other sexually after traditional marriage until they have done with Church wedding. Who gave us this instruction? Jesus Christ or who? Please I need to know.
In Africa, we have our own cultural form of marriage called the traditional marriage. Once a man pays the bride price/dowry of the woman, he is officially married. But why have we decided to make the white wedding in Africa such a huge thing? Why have we decided to adopt a culture that’s not ours and make it a law and cross for people? Many people have gone into huge debt in the name of a white wedding. Couples have separated because of white weddings. In some African churches if you are not wedded in the church, your marriage is not even considered legal. In Nigeria, people celebrate the white wedding even more than the traditional wedding.
I will say this emphatically here: There is no special blessing attached to a church marriage. In fact, there is nothing spiritual about marriage in and of itself. Some churches will say you have to go through a series of counseling before some marriage committee before you will be wed. I know of ladies who have brought their intended husbands first to their Pastors even before their parents or family elders. Where did we get this idea from, people? The average young couple of today take time to prepare for their white wedding – the type of white gown/suit they will buy, the number in their bridal party, the entrance music, the dance, the kind of food, the cake – but they don’t take time to plan and prepare for the marriage itself.
The duty of the Church or pastor is to preach Jesus Christ and not to be holding marriage ceremonies. The Bible has not given the Church any such duties. If you are a Westerner, then do your white wedding/ court marriage because that’s your culture. If you are an African, have your traditional marriage and be okay with it. That’s your culture. Yesterday, a brother sent me a very long email saying his fiancee says if he doesn’t give her a white wedding, she is not interested in the marriage. Do you see what we have unconsciously caused for ourselves as Africans?
Now, if you choose to have Church Marriage, it’s your choice to make. But never attach any special spiritual blessing or importance to that, for there is none. Many young men are still single today, not because they don’t want to marry their girlfriends but because they don’t have the money yet to finance a white wedding. Africans no longer even fancy or celebrate their traditional marriage ceremony like they do the white wedding. All in the name of wearing Brazilian/Italian wedding gowns and an Italian Suit. Who has bewitched us?
AN Excerpt from my new Book: THE MISREPRESENTED GOD. GREAT IGWE